Why I don’t want Kids : No I won’t change my mind

It’s been ingrained into our society that women must be mothers. Women are constantly asked, “When are you having kids?” or “How many kids do you want?”. Ever since I was little I  have loved kids so people always assume I want my own or to have a huge family.

Stigmas on Having Kids

Drinking hot tea in Manchaster

Everyone just assumes that women want to have kids. This is not the case for a lot of women. Not only because they don’t want to but some women can’t. Not just once have I been asked what I am going to do when I am old or how will I be fulfilled. Women can do more than just keep a home and have children. Also,  by no means saying that kids will ruin your life or that they aren’t a special part of life. All I am saying is that not everyone wants or can have them. As a woman, I don’t think having a child will be what fulfills my life or gives me purpose. For some being a stay at home, mom is all they have ever wanted and that’s just not me.

My Background

From the age of 10, I have babysat, been a nanny, preschool teacher and Aupair. There is not a doubt in my mind that I love and think children are a great part of life. Being a certified professional nanny and having been a live-in Aupair has given me a unique opportunity to see children in all of their stages. Deciding to not want children is not to rebel or anything like that, simply is just not something I want in my life. Just like some people don’t want to eat meat or drink alcohol.


Became a big sister again at 20 and 23 from my parents adopting 2 kids!

Reason for Not Wanting Kids

Having made the very educated decision of not wanting children after getting past the “you’ll change your mind” people always ask why. First off I love sending them home with their parents! Children are a joy but there is nothing quite like drinking your coffee hot or a glass of wine alone. As well as I honestly don’t like where this country and the world are environmentally and politically. That is something I don’t want to raise a child in.  Foster and adoption are very valid ways to have a child so if I ever change my mind there are routes to have kids.

So no I do not want to have my own children regardless of how much I love them, and no I will not be changing my mind. That is my case but not all women get a choice in not having kids so stop asking unless they have told you. Some women may change their mind but that’s for them to decide not you to tell them! Just be kind to people and don’t be an asshole!

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